Remembering Robert
I drew this portrait of Robert on grey paper with charcoal & white conte; it took me an hour & a half--I was able to draw him very quickly, probably because he was so close to my heart.
As you know, Robert, my husband & partner of 24 years is now in heaven school, reviewing his 69 years of gracing our planet. I am glad he doesn’t have to experience short arms & a tired heart any more. Thanks to all who came to Robert’s memorial, prayed for me, sent cards & gave financial help. Living without Robert is way difficult; we loved each other deeply. I miss talking with him, my favorite friend & therapist; we celebrated & had fun together. Robert took care of a lot of errands, like shopping, paying bills & going to food pantries. He filled in the gaps that I took for granted.
One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned has been about unpredictability. There are no real absolutes except change & that happens constantly. If I had had even an inkling of how quickly Robert was going to pass, I may have slowed down a little & kissed him more. He was very tender & loving with me. There was no way I could have predicted his sudden death. I was in shock for over a month & sometimes it still seems incredible that Robert has passed forward.
Thankfully I still feel him around me & we are both guided by Gurunath. In fact, Robert does Kriya Yog on the Other Side to reduce his karma. He is even more aware now of God’s love, wisdom & profound information. At this point, he is probably in touch with his friends & the animals who have passed on; he loved many animals before me & we had many that we loved together. It is a severe life-changing event to have Robert leave so suddenly. I cope a tiny bit better each day & go to grief counseling, which helps a bit. My friends are my main lifelines.
Nights & the holidays are the hardest. Please continue to pray for me as I live without Robert’s physical presence. He was a large part of my living & now I am adjusting & trying to begin anew without him, growing back my right arm. I continue to do daily Kriya Yog meditation and write & reflect a little on what is happening, inside & outside of me.
One of Robert's most beautiful qualities was his supreme encouragement to do my art. He encouraged me like no one else could. I loved his "You rock, woman" attitude because I knew how much he believed in my abilities. I owe him so much! Robert was & is my forever partner.
One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned has been about unpredictability. There are no real absolutes except change & that happens constantly. If I had had even an inkling of how quickly Robert was going to pass, I may have slowed down a little & kissed him more. He was very tender & loving with me. There was no way I could have predicted his sudden death. I was in shock for over a month & sometimes it still seems incredible that Robert has passed forward.
Thankfully I still feel him around me & we are both guided by Gurunath. In fact, Robert does Kriya Yog on the Other Side to reduce his karma. He is even more aware now of God’s love, wisdom & profound information. At this point, he is probably in touch with his friends & the animals who have passed on; he loved many animals before me & we had many that we loved together. It is a severe life-changing event to have Robert leave so suddenly. I cope a tiny bit better each day & go to grief counseling, which helps a bit. My friends are my main lifelines.
Nights & the holidays are the hardest. Please continue to pray for me as I live without Robert’s physical presence. He was a large part of my living & now I am adjusting & trying to begin anew without him, growing back my right arm. I continue to do daily Kriya Yog meditation and write & reflect a little on what is happening, inside & outside of me.
One of Robert's most beautiful qualities was his supreme encouragement to do my art. He encouraged me like no one else could. I loved his "You rock, woman" attitude because I knew how much he believed in my abilities. I owe him so much! Robert was & is my forever partner.